Vaide’s memories

 Kadalaimittai.                   Had to write this after reading Sumathi Manivannan ‘s post.               I was first introduced to it by my father’s eldest brother. He would bring the sweet wrapped in a butter paper . This is  what he always brought whenever he came  from Trichy to visit us at Chennai. His words too were similar. More saththu than your sugar candies. We children would wait for his visits. Then we lost touch with such simple things.                  Years later I found it at the SRC canteen at Trichy. Actually I need not enter the canteen at all. It caters to the day scholars , whereas I was a hostel inmate. Well that is me. After a heavy lunch at the mess I would give myself dessert. 2 pieces of kadalaimittai for 10p . Everyday without fail. . I would feel at the top of the world.          ...

 Watching TV .             When we started watching TV in the early 80s it was a community affair. Even later when everyone got their, own TVs the grandfather who rented the DVD player was most popular in the neighbourhood.              Now it seems everyone needs a me alone TV . So that they can watch programmes of their choice. Of course you can watch the same on your cellphone too. Not as comfortable though.               Two weeks earlier Sriram’s room A/ c started leaking. Since calling the AC mechanic was not an option due to Corona lockdown he migrated with all his paraphernalia to the drawing room.                 No Thappad, Family katta, or such family dramas for me for the past 10 days. No flowing tears after watching an emotional drama.           I was on a diet of the full season of Mandalori...

 #வீட்டு_பட்ஜெட்  #யானைபுக்கநிலம்                       Growing up I have seen my parents literally count the pennies. Their priorities being a very good education for us four and healthy food. In all other areas they would follow the misers rules.                    Come marriage and here I was in a family with an old lady at the helm of affairs. Triple income . Both of us in banks and the old lady getting good rentals .                   On  salary day , we both would hand over our full wages . She would keep it in the  pooja room . Later  keep it in the cash box. (Picture below )and the cash box in the iron safe, somewhat similar to the image from the net,  only ours was well painted and well maintained. Bala Krishna inside. A relic from the Timber merchant days of the family.         ...

 #என்_சினி_வானில்                Take Rowan Atkinson, give him the role of Mr Bean or Johnny English and the film is  sure to be a laugh riot.                  So many films have taken us to Tibet  and Nepal where the the Westerners learn everything from martial arts to meditation. Only English can make us laugh even in this.   “ rarefied” atmosphere.                  At one time I would watch the Home Alone series with my children for the Nth time and laugh,  now it has lost its charm.                Some films may be categorised as comedy but certain scenes would have some pathos and find resonance in your own heart.                     Just last night I was watching Barbara Streisand in , The mirror has  two faces.  The platonic...

 Sunday special  #தீராத_விளையாட்டுப்_பிள்ளை            Yesterday I had written on this title about our own family Olympics  at Bikaner.             Then I saw the posts of so many friends ,  they had displayed their certificates. Well I do have some certificates from more than 50 years ago . What better time than this to give them a day in the sun. ( incidentally my son said he has never seen the old 😁certificates.)              Yes like every other lady has said I too was active on the sports field in school. In college the Chemistry department frowned on frivolous activities. They however could not  dissuade me from the NCC . It was there  in my blood.                    Then job and marriage within a short period and I lost touch with all games and sports. Except when I went to visit my parents. It was another ...

 #என்னைப்_பாதித்த_படைப்பு               Erin Brockovich            I have seen this movie each and every time it was shown on some channel on TV.          This is a , year 2000  Hollywood movie, named and based on the life of a real person portrayed by Julia Roberts.                        Let me give a  very short synopsis . Erin Brockovich is an out of work ,one time beauty queen . She already has failed marriages behind her and children to support. Trying for compensation after an accident , she some how gets a job in this law firm. ( okay by hook and crook)                          She knows no law.  So she is given some menial job . Going through the files of the Pacific Gas and Electric co. (PG&E) she finds medical records along with home pu...

 #பாரம்பரிய உணவு          Very late in life I realised that as an Iyengar my  food cravings should have  been for vaththakulambu and Puliyodharai while it was not so.. Probably the in laws usual grumble that I had been brought up ,upside down was true.         Married at 17 pushed into a Punjabi and Sikh world at the Meerut Cantonment, my mother was more familiar with aloo paranthas, tariwala sabji, dal makhani, kofta curries.           Getting ready for school in Madras we  children would each get 1 and 1/2 paranthas, with sabji,  usually  lady’s finger or potato  and  a dal. All sabji s would have onion. All dals would have ginger, a little garlic ,onion,  green chilli and tomato. No fancy masalas,  no obsession with green coriander.           Sunday  would be stuffed parantha day.           Again very ...

 #எப்படி_இருந்த_நான்                     Are you an Iyengar asks my class cum hostel mate on my first day at college in Trichy. Yes I say, slightly hesitant . Does one talk about such things still. Her next question floors me completely.   Vadakalai or Thengalai ? She may as well be talking in Greek or Latin. Let me tell you that after consulting with my grandma .                                             Five years later I am in Chennai and just married. No no your way of sevikkaradu is completely wrong they say. Your Tamil is so strange.                        I laugh and laugh when the grand mother in law tells me that we should start for Ayanavaram, my father in law’s place only after Rahu Kalam. Isn’t that something they see while conducting marriag...

 #சின்ன_சின்ன_ஆசை part 2.                In my school and college days I was that extremely directionless person.                    Some classmate would say  IAS and I would parrot IAS. Someone else said Electronics and even though I was not keen on it I would say Electronics.                Even after finishing my BSc in Chemistry l just did an MA in English by correspondence to while away my time.               There was my father with high hopes,  thinking I would turn out into someone brilliant.😁                              The frustrated family took things in their hand and got me an application for bank exams. Clerical post.                   Okay nothing wrong with me academically s...

 #சபாஷ்மத்யமர்_படக்குறுங்கதைப்போட்டி  part 3                       She stood there all alone with a lot of grace . Her posture was at once alluring and commanding. She was a real  classic  beauty.   Only now nobody saw  her or remarked about her . Unseeing eyes passed her by everyday.                    When shop spaces were auctioned in front of the huge temple the authorities saw to it that she was positioned outside a shop .. Small mercy. With time she became just a prop for that  shop.   Everyday the shop’s paraphernalia would   surround   and submerge her.                      That shop was actually an office for guided tours. They had sea facing cottages to let  with all  amenities and swimming pools.  . Air buses to take you around on their tours of temples a...

 30 th January 1948                    My father was a great patriot and a   follower of Gandhi and his principles. Simple living . Khadi at all times. No accumulation. No wastage . Shram dhan . This was what he lived by . However he was also an active member of the RSS.                      30 th Jan 1948 11 am . With the passing away of Gandhi all prominent members of the RSS in Trichy were rounded up .  Appa , along with them.                     From Trichy they are sent by train to the Vellore prison.                     In our early childhood we had no idea about appa’s colourful past. Once we were on a holiday and were crisscrossing the country by train . Somewhere near Calcutta a gentleman got into our first class coupe . How could someone intrude here ...

 #தனித்திறமைகள்              Even by the time she finished her KG classes her school introduced her to fire less cooking. So  my granddaughter Architaa or AK Bones as she likes to call herself is very familiar with the kitchen. Muffins, paneer rolls , cutlets / potato shapes pizza toppings she has been doing it for so long. Only our rice and sambhar are beyond her.          Painting. There she is like a Vincent Van Gogh in the making. 😁One year she was bitten by the organic bug and she had to make the paints from herbs , turmeric etc. All greeting cards have her special touch.          Then I posted a picture how I made cushion covers out of a shawl and masks from left over cloth. The competition started . Her favourite owl on the cushion. Yes definitely her great grandma’s genes.           Done well in Ballet, Karate , but like all children when she hears our Da...

 #Sunday special  Letter to  some friends in Madhyamar             Hi dear friends whom I introduced to Madhyamar,           I am sure you are enjoying reading the posts in Madhyamar like me. I would have given you a list of people to follow too . Then I thought it would be better if you discovered people on your own.  You may like some subjects that I don’t usually follow.            Some time has passed since I introduced you. I see some likes and a few comments from you people. When are you going to take the next big step and post your own posts. Look at my ex boss Mr. Murlidharan  Ramarao. Already he has got the  Rising Star stamp. All of you have so many different experiences in your life. It is enough to write about them . People will relate to it.            Did you see the movie Thappad? I  know I am going on and on about it ?...

 Chow chow aka Bangalore kathirikai or squash.       We are there in fertile lands . Shillong. Our Kitchen garden is extending upto the Umpling river flowing behind our house.          In addition my parents,  more so my mother has green fingers.  Beautiful flower gardens in front and lots and lots of vegetables at the back.          Yes we had that chow chow pandal. As others here on Madhyamar have already said it was poriyal , koota , sambar etc everyday. No place to even keep the harvest. We must have plucked more than sixty.       We tried giving some to our neighbors. No one wanted it. We ourselves are in a fix not knowing how to dispose of them was their reply.         You know the punjabis love their lauki koftas. Lauki ... bottle gourd or suraikai.  How different is the chow chow from lauki when grated ? So we had chow chow dry koftas for snacks and i...

 Company for the old.                       When my Prabandham teacher passed away in 2018 , his wife decided to continue the group readings.                               Now almost 80 and living alone ,( her daughters living  in the city look after her every comfort) she finds companionship in us.                           She looks forward to our daily visits. Loves the gossip we share . After our reading there she is with a small portion of the dish she has made as tiffin.                           Though alone she is never lonely.                             I don’t know how it can be worked out or the logistics of the procedure. I h...

 #தனித்திறமைகள்                  Wonder if this comes under a special talent . Anyway allow me to show off.                     Since I shifted residence to Ashok Nagar in 2011 , I have become more health conscious. I will either go for long walks , work out in the gym or go to the Yoga class.  Yes a lot of healthy activities . Keeps you in a good mood due to the the endorphins released.                     Last year just as I was completing age 65 I got the chance to attend a yoga training session for asst. yoga teacher. Every morning for 40 days from 5.30 to 8. Sometimes even upto 9. With a breakfast break when we would have the Pongal Prasadam from the Anjaneya temple.😅                     No pain no gain , and I found this to be very true.       ...

 First day at Ghatkopar Mumbai.                After my marriage in 1976 I got myself transferred to Mumbai as my husband was working there.                 First day in the branch and I introduced myself to the Agent and accountant as they were then called .                  Oh Madrasi ! they said. Which departments have you worked in . Airily I  told them I had worked in all departments of the bank including cash. Looking at me all of 22 years they gave a jerk looked at my order again and asked how many years service. 1 and 1/2 years. Both of them had a good laugh.  Those 1 and 1/2 years I had spent in a newly opened branch at T Nagar. 😁                  Like T. Nagar this too was a double shift branch. Just after we returned from lunch one Mr Lokesh same age as me  said , come I will introduce yo...

 Yoga and Appa         By a coincidence Yoga day and Father’s Day have come on the same day this year.           For me Appa and Yoga are synonymous.            Right from his teenage when he joined RSS in Trichy till he passed away at age 96 in 2018 ,he would do some yoga first  thing in the morning.             Relatives may laugh in derision when they go on tours  together. Nothing would stop him. He would get up earlier and just do it.               Yes he tried to teach me . You can only take the horse upto the trough.😁                His stand was vindicated when the whole world turned to yoga as the cost effective way to keep healthy.                  So when the health bug bit me I too got into it. For me the Anjaneya temple Ashok N...

 Letters.         My earliest memory of writing letters was when I was in class 2 or 3 in Chennai . One inland cover completely covered . Amma got one or two sides.  At first we 3 children and later 4 of us started writing to Appa .           Appa was somewhere in the J&K , Ladakh border with China. No we never wrote that நலம், நலமரிய ஆவல்.  So to this day I am unable to add that to my letters. Amma would write in Tamil and we would write in English. Most content too would be provided by Amma.             Some relatives visit, new activities. Books we got from the library etc. Appa would give us a list of books to read. Movies to go to. Once when Appa wrote that he would be coming on a visit . I wrote that I was excited about that. I was so proud of my vocabulary. Sad so say spelling not  that good. So Appa’s next letter said, Happy that you are happy , you are excited and n...

 Pillaiyar Chathurthi.                That maida and turmeric Ganesha video was making the rounds, so I thought why not . Even our clay ones are eco- friendly but then with clay you wash your hands a thousand times.                 Just when I thought I had got the hang of it , the pillaiyar went into the slouching mode , yes started sagging. So I added more maida to firm it up . Nope. Then I did the only thing I could think of. Made an inverted cup into a pedestal and camouflaged it with flowers. 😁                  Then my sis in law peeped in . How did that Pillaiyar come out.? I had to push it on a bamboo stick she said. 😁                      We had both used about 100 gms  of ingredients. I dread to think what happened to the I kg  atta that my another friend was going to use. 😁 ...

 #Sunday special # எங்கள் வீட்டுத் தூண்              A family has to necessarily have at least  2 pillars to be balanced  . One complementing the other . That was how we were . I was and still am that practical person who will rush to finish jobs, correct mistakes , get things done. Right or wrong my decisions would be quick and final. My husband was the mulling kind. He would need a lot of time to react. More emotional .             Both of us were earning. However I would never think of loosening my purse strings,  while he would please the children with food outings , fun games at home and new gadgets . A soft touch. The children could twist him round their fingers.                A person is the sum total of his experiences. Having been brought up by his grandma. my husband was more tuned in to the physical suffering of elders. Yes he was the one to rush ...

 #திருப்புமுனை Sunday special              Nothing spectacular about my life. It just moves along leisurely.         If  you ask me about a turning point I can give you only a small bend in the road.        I had shifted to my father’s apartment in Ashok Nagar and joined a gym. At last I have started minding about my health. It will be yet more time before I streamline my eating habits.           Anyway a big leap for me. Now the gym rules say I should either wear a track suit or a salwar set. So exactly 35 years since I went into a saree only mode , I got myself some salwar sets.            Appa was so pleased that now I was one with his daughters in law  that he got me a few for my birthday. 😁😁          I became so comfortable in my new avatar that it became my dress of choice.  So except when I go to my r...

 #உடன்பிறப்பே The  boy on the balcony.         One day  3 years back my youngest brother Sampath  came to my home . He gave me a Kamala orange and said , I have returned your orange now take me to a movie.        I can’t understand head or tail of Sampath mama's  barter  said my son Sriram..  What  orange what movie.        Here is a recap leading to that puzzling conversation.         I had joint FB and befriended people about my age. Most of them had a rural back ground or had some relatives whom  they visited in the villages. The fun they had as youngsters , the village temple festivals this was what they wrote about.         I have always lived in cities, my one grand parent was a nomadic Railway official  mostly in Andhra and the other a barrister based in Trichy . The Trichy grandpa had given a right of way to a Mariamman temple...

 Three months since my daughter was here and 5 months since I went to the yoga teacher’s training.            Why I am telling you this.  Always she will boast about her yoga , gym ,walking , Fitbit even though she does not lose even a kg. Yes I know that is what your mind voice is telling you.            Actually what I wanted to say was, I was going through my kitchen cupboards. Packets of pumpkin seeds and sun flower seeds. My daughter has no idea that we get them here so she got them for me. One steel dubba filled with a mixture of herb powders.  Got by me from Arya Gowda road in the first flush of enthusiasm during the Herbs and natural therapies class .              No I cannot take the powder nor the seeds daily , just beyond me.                     So yesterday I turned the seeds into chikki by making Vella pagu and ...

 Monday I went to the AP tourism office off Venkatnarayana Road and asked about earliest tickets available. Luckily 2 seats were available for Tuesday itself.                  So by 5 am next morning my son and I were there . Breakfast and lunch included in the ticket . We will stop for high tea in the evening , but you have to pay for that yourselves ,we were told.                  I am dreaming of Puris and Hotel Bhima’s when the bus stopped at  Vijay Babu , just across the AP tourism highway hotel .  Yes clean. People are having Puris and Dosais.  No not for us. We are the package herd. We are introduced as such. We each get 2 idlis, 1 vadai and a little bit of Upma. Slightly lukewarm but edible. Speedy service. Waiting for us for some time no doubt.                Me ,I am the coffee aficionado.. Coffee I ask. The waiter points outside...

 Sunday topic #தீராத_விளையாட்டுப்_பிள்ளை    # sports and games.                Whichever house we lived in as children we had a mandatory court where we would play shuttlecock or Tennikoit. This was in addition to the games we played with our neighbourhood children. Since we lived in army leased houses we were lucky to have a lot of space .                  When Appa ( it was actually Amma) built our Ashok Nagar house the first thing we did was lay out  a court.                   Inbetween for a year or so we were in Bikaner . House on about 8 to 10 grounds of land. Yes we could lay any number of courts we wanted. The sad reality was that we had no neighbours with children . We were in the Contonment  area far outside the city and all our classmates were inside . Most of them lived in palaces.          ...

 #தீராத_விளையாட்டுப்_பிள்ளை   The equestrian              It was the holidays after my first year in college. My brothers and I are in various places. We join together at the Chennai Central and set off for Hazaribagh.                               Who knows where this place is. Appa has said “ come to Hazaribagh for the holidays”.  We pore over maps and find out it is in Bihar near Ranchi. ( now in Jharkhand) Today every cricket fan in India is familiar with Ranchi . Well Dhoni was yet to be born then.                   Changing trains at Kolkata ‘s Sealdah we reach Hazaribagh Road station and reach the BSF headquarters on some lorry or truck.                     Extremely charming layout and surroundings. Clean green . Well laid out roads inside the HQ. ...

 வீடு. The selling              1984 my husband’s grandma in law decided to sell the house we are living in  ,in Rameswaram Road/ street T Nagar .               This house was constructed in 1919 by her father in-law. The father in law’s brothers too constructed similar houses near by. One of them became a kalyana chatram on Ramanathan street and another a flat complex on Rangan street.                 The original 7 grounds of our house had already been reduced to 5 as 2 grounds were sold long back to pay for recurring health expenses of one or the other. ( each ground was sold for Rs 11000/. I know this as the  buyers when they themselves sold their house to Dr Dhanraj orthopaedic surgeon for his clinic in the 1990s told me  so. . We bought for 11000 and sold for 11 lakhs were his words. )                 ...

 # Sunday special topic.            Whenever this topic of houses is mentioned my blood  begins to boil. How I have been cheated out of something every bank employee takes for granted.           Every Subramani, Ramasami and Geetha was there at the housing loan table . The loan amount started with just 50000/ and went  on to 1 lakh and the highest was about  10 lakhs some decades later. Yes people were buying 2 or 3 bedroom apartments in T Nagar for 50000/ when I started my job .             Someone had given this super advice to my husband : take no loan and live happily ever after. He followed it to the letter. You may ask why not take the loan in your  own name . The guarantor had to be the PF nominee. Who else could be your PF nominee other than your husband  / wife  . Bound in from all sides.  As the years went on  , my colleagues were taking t...

 #பரீட்சைக்கு_நேரமாச்சு               No I have never been late for any test or exam. However my subconscious mind does give me dreams , where  I return home before reaching school :  To take a pen, hall ticket or even to dress modestly 😁. Why the last I don’t know. I am a prude and happy to tell you that there is never a pin out of place.                 Whatever I have read I will always write in my own words. No word for word memorising or verbal spitting out for me. Thank God I studied in a CBSE school. No imagination so I can never fill up pages after pages of nonsense.                  Of all the school , college and office exams I have written. I remember this class test to this day. It proved something to me about myself .                    I must have been in the 3 rd or 4 th class. I have...

 #மழை                We were then living in the army leased house near Sun theatre behind the Sikh Gurudwara T Nagar .                1962 . I remember the year because I was in class 3 and I had just started opening my eyes to the world around me. The rains  literally poured down. There was this slum some way off with low lying lands in between.  The whole area was flooded. I distinctly remember a regular boat plying over the waters and rescuing people and their belongings  that they had bundled up.          Next thing we knew there were hundreds of people under the portico of our house.  They were cooking and eating there. My brothers and I were only silent spectators. Sorry to tell you , we were even afraid that they would barge into our house upstairs .  So much for childhood compassion.            Five years later we ar...

 Foreword                Jayamma was my husband’s maternal grandma and the one who brought him up. When I was married I was 22 to her 67.  As a working woman my days were just fled by. Other than the basic courtesy words I had no time to interact with her even though we lived  in the same house . Her timings were different . She would get up as early as 3 am and finish her bath and Pooja .By the  time I woke up she would be fast asleep !                However thrice a year we got that bonding time or rather she got a captive audience of one.                 Every year in May-June the Brahmotsavam of Lord Varadaraja would be celebrated at Kancheepuram. This family had an ongoing tradition of supplying yellow kanakambaram flower garlands to the temple on the second day of the festival. So one week earlier I would go to the Broadway flower market...